Be Careful What You Ask For

Be careful what you ask forI spent this past weekend celebrating my fiancé’s belated birthday in San Francisco. Living within 10 miles of the city it’s not unusual for us to spend a night in town. Yet what was lusciously different for us this time was that we chose a completely different neighborhood in which to hang out. This time we stayed in Japantown.

I’m a native San Franciscan and have lived a majority of my life in the Bay Area, yet I’m embarrassed to say that I have never stepped foot in Japantown until this weekend. It reminded me of how getting out of my ruts always leads me to look at life with a fresh pair of eyes.

This weekend I realized how important it is to focus on what I have been able to create in my life instead of where I am lagging behind in where I want to be. It’s so easy for me to fall into the trap of thinking that my business isn’t doing this or that while totally losing sight of how blessed I am to have a business that enables me to spend every day working with my fiance and very best friend. My instincts tell me this will be far more important as I reflect back on my life at its end than my client list and annual revenues.

Thoughts Taking Form

Be careful what you ask for. I went to Maui for the first time in the summer of 2002 for a retreat with best-selling inspirational author Alan Cohen. One of the memorable exercises for me was describing to a partner what an ideal day would look like. I found myself sharing something that I’d never given deep thought to yet it felt right at the time. I shared that I’d love to have a business that my significant other was a part of. I was single at the time working in a corporate job and partnership had eluded me for several years. So this idea seemed like a pipe-dream that I never expected would come to fruition.

I met Dean five years later and when his business came to a fork I seized the opportunity to ask him to join me in mine.

This weekend I was reminded of how powerful it is to be aware of desires that you have that may not be a part of your daily consciousness. You have to be in touch with what you want before you can reach out to claim what you want when the opportunities present themselves.

How to Stay Focused on Your Goal

Is there something that you wish to achieve or create in your life, yet you lack the confidence in yourself to follow through? Here are some tips for staying relentlessly focused on your goal.

  1. Break your goal into executable steps.
  2. Recognize that the key to achieving your goals is following through with the necessary steps.
  3. Assign a schedule for each step and commit it to your calendar.
  4. Use your calendar as your “to do” list. If you can’t get to a step on the scheduled date, reschedule it. Keep the step on your calendar until its completion.
  5. If you are feeling resistance to following through with a particular step, get in touch with the belief that is in your way.
  6. Replace the limiting belief with an idea that empowers you to move forward. Get inspired from someone who believes in you.
  7. Hold yourself responsible for the life you create. Don’t allow room for regrets!

An Exercise for Breaking through Obstacles

I had one of my most fulfilling experiences on Friday when I was invited to speak at a nonprofit organization whose mission is to help those who are most in need to succeed. Sixty women who are enrolled in various vocational job training programs attended my workshop, “The Secret to Success”. Why was it so fulfilling? Because for at least our 90 minutes together, my ideas made a difference.

The breakthrough lesson was how our beliefs are all that holds us back from taking the steps to succeed. We did an exercise that first asked them to write answers to the following:

  • What fears do you have about your job future?
  • What ideas are limiting what you think you can achieve or become in your life?
  • What is holding you back from believing you can stay dedicated to doing the necessary work?

In the second part of the exercise, I asked them to go back and write down what new ideas they could replace the ones above with that would support them in taking action. After a few minutes, several shared how writing their thoughts down enabled them to get clarity they’d never had before.

We can help ourselves break through all our obstacles if only we look closely enough to see what they are.

Try the exercise yourself and see what you might learn.

www.innerarchitect.com

Finding Clues of Guidance in the Midst of Everyday Life

I have just returned from BookExpo America (BEA), the book industry’s annual event held this year at the Los Angeles Convention Center, where I went to promote the debut of my book, Inner Architect: How to Build the Life You Were Designed to Live. I expected the experience to be one of value, learning, and building relationships. What I didn’t expect was to discover what occurred to me while I mentally noted the highlights of the event during our final day. As I focused on these highlights, I saw a common thread that weaved throughout the launch of my book that would have totally bypassed my consciousness had I not stopped to casually review. I believe this common thread provides a direction for me that I would not have taken seriously had the energy of life not have shoved it in my face.

I’d like to share my clues and my perception of the guidance they provide, and then invite you to look at recent, or not so recent, events in your life where there might be direction sitting there for you.

Clue #1: My company, inner architect, published the book using a standard off-set printer who specializes in the book industry. Upon our request for production samples, the printer we ultimately chose sent us two books published by Hay House. I didn’t think anything more about this at the time than the printer wanted to promote that they had a well known, prestigious client.

Clue #2: Louise Hay author and founder of Hay House, happened to be autographing books in the Hay House booth at BEA while my partner, Dean and I walked by. Dean took my bashful arm and led me to stand next to him in the line to meet Louise. When it was our turn to greet her, Dean introduced me and thanked her for the inspiration she provided to us to launch our publishing company. Once again, I didn’t take this for anything more than shear luck of being in the right place at the right time to meet Louise Hay, a woman I respect and honor for her contribution to the human development movement.

Clue #3: Later that day at BEA we stopped to talk with a man promoting international distribution services. We proudly showed him our new book and he responded with a comment about it being along the lines of what Hay House publishes. He went on to tell us that a company that had recently lost the Hay House account would likely welcome something to replace it. I felt encouraged by his comment, yet didn’t see the meaning in this exchange until I put all three of these clues together.

My interpretation of these clues: I was led to look at a woman who I deeply admire as a model for my own work in a way that I had never considered on my own.

What to take away from my experience:

  1. Look at the events that unfold in your life as having meaningful messages for you.
  2. Take the messages that you interpret seriously, even if they seem grander than visions you’ve created for yourself.
  3. Trust that these messages are meant to lead you in the direction where you will find the most fulfillment.
  4. Believe that you are capable in carrying out these messages and commit to doing the steps that will see it through.

12 Steps to Make Your Dream Your Life

I delivered the pdf file for my upcoming book, Inner Architect: How to Build the Life You Were Designed to Live, to the printer this past Thursday. On Friday afternoon something incredible hit me. I am in the process of bringing life to my dream! Holy cow. Why did it take me so long to see clearly what is right in front of me? What was I thinking to expect that one single event would bring my dream to life? It really is all about baby steps.

Three years ago this month, I walked away from a successful 20-year career in the corporate world to follow a dream. It hasn’t been an easy journey, that’s for sure, and I’ve got a ways to go. But I can see now that I am on my way.

Your way to your dream can be found in these steps:

  1. Recognize that you have the choice to create a different life.
  2. Believe that it is possible to successfully build your dream.
  3. Define the obstacles that are holding you back.
  4. Replace your obstacles with ideas that support you.
  5. Give credibility to the desires of your heart and learn to trust it.
  6. Outline your training and development needs.
  7. Crystallize your vision.
  8. Identify your major goals.
  9. Define the steps necessary to achieve your goals.
  10. Stay committed to doing the necessary work.
  11. Support your external work with thoughts that help to build it.
  12. See yourself now in the beginning stages of your new life.

Your Heart: Your Wisest Compass

Giving credibility to messages from your heart is a key step to happiness in all areas of your life. Yet most of us have not been taught to lead our lives this way. We may recognize that a fulfilled heart is the key to a happy life, yet we don’t often trust our hearts to lead us there. It is as if we expect that our heart is going to lead us down an irresponsible path of whim and wild.

 

How to trust your heart more than your analytical mind:

  1. Allow your heart to play a role in all matters of your life, just as you allow it a significant role in your personal relationships.
  2. Acknowledge that your heart is the center of your spiritual essence. As such, it is the most knowledgeable entity about who you really are at the core and what is right for you.
  3. Believe that your heart always has your best interest in mind.
  4. Practice following your heart for simple decisions so that you can build the experience to trust it in larger issues.

Money: Are Your Erroneous Views Getting in Your Way?

Money is such a driving force in our lives. It makes us do things we hate and holds us back from doing what we love. Have you ever thought that it’s not the money that holds the power? It’s what you allow your mind to believe about money.

This one-minute video is the first of a three-part series which showcases common erroneous views about money, and how you can change those views to free your mind.

Ask yourself…which of the following do you believe is the truth about money:

  1. Your ability to generate money is tied to your job. Lose your job, lose your ability.
  2. Opportunities to generate money are everywhere. You just need to open your mind to the possibilities.

Stay tuned for more.

http://www.innerarchitect.com