Finding the Confidence to Show Up as Yourself

confidence

I have been feeling antsy since the COVID-19 pandemic shut down the world around me as I know it. It’s not at all a feeling born out of boredom. In fact, I’m blessed to still be working and I have been finding many joys in living a simpler life.

Imagining the Role of Purpose

My feeling antsy stems from my mindset that I am always looking for the purpose behind events. I believe that we live in a universe that operates from a far deeper level of purpose than we typically credit.

For me, I’ve been feeling a nagging thought in the back of my mind over the past couple of months that there is something I am being called to do differently as a result of this crisis. I want to make a positive contribution to people’s lives as we endure this and beyond. Yet I have disappointed myself. I’ve done little to carry out what I want to do.

Getting in Touch with Obstacles

Today I got in touch with a theme in my life that holds me back from taking steps in important new directions. I haven’t given myself any leeway to just show up in any form without having a fully crafted plan on what I want to say or do.

My perfectionist tendencies have been holding me back.

There are areas in my life where I feel super confident and then there are places where I feel that I need to “practice” being me. For example, producing videos to promote the business I run with my husband. I’ve felt like I need to script everything before we shoot. Consequently, the shoots get flubbed by the fake sounding script memorization and nothing gets produced.

Other people show up comfortably for a video shoot. Why can’t I?

My Lesson Learned

I’ve realized that the best way for me to make a positive impact on others is to show up with my flaws. I just need to practice feeling more comfortable in front of the camera. And trusting my spirit to guide me as I begin to write without knowing where things will lead.

It’s not about knowing what the end game will be. It’s more about participating and believing that you will be led to the place that is uniquely right for you and what others can learn from your unique perspective.

There’s so much we can all learn from each other during this time. Let’s support each other in doing so.

Be well,
Susan

Gotta Have Faith

“Faith is knowing that if you step off a cliff you will be taught how to fly.” – Author Unknown

Last night I was cleaning my wedding rings while standing at the bathroom sink. First I polished my square cut diamond engagement ring and put it safely back onto my finger. I reached for my wedding ring next, yet fumbled and watched it fall quickly into the sink and slip beyond the stop that I had foolishly left open. Uh-oh. What was I going to do?

I could see the small diamond chipped ring trapped in the metal basket that kept it from going down the drain pipe. But the stop didn’t open far enough to enable me to reach for it. For some reason I wasn’t panicking. Although I didn’t know exactly how to go about retrieving the ring, I felt the strong sense that I would get it back.

My husband Dean was downstairs watching TV while my little scene had been unfolding. I called down to him saying that I needed his help. He came to my aid and we tried a number of small tools to fish out the ring, but even a pair of tweezers was too big.

Dean remembered that we had some leftover wire sheeting that we had used for a DIY project a few years earlier. He ran down to the garage, got the wire sheeting, brought it upstairs to the bathroom, and started snipping away at it to mold it into a fishing tool. I was given the responsibility of shining the flashlight on the open stop while he diligently worked to pull my ring out from the basket. After much effort I watched Dean make contact with the ring and guide it through the opening before dropping it back into my hand. Success!

I have really been conscious lately of the influence that my thoughts have on what I ultimately attract as my experience. I didn’t know how we were going to get the ring back to safety, but I never wavered from the belief that we would.

I have to wonder if our final outcome would’ve been different if I had been crying or swearing from a place of fear, rather than feeling a calm sense of peace that everything was going to be okay.

Getting Rid of Your Shoulds

I’m celebrating my 10-year anniversary of leaving a corporate job that no longer fit to go out on my own. The journey has brought a few twists and turns that I didn’t expect, plan, or want. But I remain grateful for where I am now and all of the life experiences and learning I gained when I made the decision to follow my heart.

I have discovered that my greatest handicap to living my full potential is getting beyond the beliefs about what I “should” be doing. I have allowed my life in many times to be directed by thinking that has become ingrained and which does not support the path that I’m committed to. Instead I strive to work on paying attention to where my body, mind and soul are leading me.

It’s easy to get so wrapped up with the day-to-day of what you’re doing that you lose sight of how you feel about it or if what you’re doing is really how you want to be spending your precious days here. I frequently recognize how I put my life on auto pilot, accepting it for what it is without even considering that it could or should be any different.

I think the answer lies in living day by day. Not waking up to each new morning buying into the belief that because it worked for me yesterday that it continues to be how I want to spend my time. It’s a raising of the bar of what I want to accept as my life experience.

I’ve made a vow to try something new. I’m going to give as much thought every day to how I’m spending my time overall as to what I’m going to choose to eat for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Let me know if you want to join me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Where are You Placing Your Trust?

I was reminded today in a business meeting how much what we believe in impacts what we expect, and ultimately, what we manifest in our lives. This understanding is especially critical during times when we are easily tempted to believe in what we don’t want to manifest. Right now that temptation is financial crisis.

Can you see, though, that if you believe that you are in the midst of a financial crisis, that you are setting the intention to crash financially? Who wants that??? Sure, the stock market is behaving wildly, credit is hard to come by, and many of us are losing money in our investments. Yet markets turn and movement goes in a different direction.

In times like this we tend to forget that we are guided by Mother Nature and not Wall Street. Put your trust in the good of Mother Nature and give yourself permission to reject messages about financial lack. Instead set your intention to prosper. It won’t happen unless you open your mind to the possibility and follow through with the actions that will produce that flow.

An Exercise for Breaking through Obstacles

I had one of my most fulfilling experiences on Friday when I was invited to speak at a nonprofit organization whose mission is to help those who are most in need to succeed. Sixty women who are enrolled in various vocational job training programs attended my workshop, “The Secret to Success”. Why was it so fulfilling? Because for at least our 90 minutes together, my ideas made a difference.

The breakthrough lesson was how our beliefs are all that holds us back from taking the steps to succeed. We did an exercise that first asked them to write answers to the following:

  • What fears do you have about your job future?
  • What ideas are limiting what you think you can achieve or become in your life?
  • What is holding you back from believing you can stay dedicated to doing the necessary work?

In the second part of the exercise, I asked them to go back and write down what new ideas they could replace the ones above with that would support them in taking action. After a few minutes, several shared how writing their thoughts down enabled them to get clarity they’d never had before.

We can help ourselves break through all our obstacles if only we look closely enough to see what they are.

Try the exercise yourself and see what you might learn.

Money: Are Your Erroneous Views Getting in Your Way?

Money is such a driving force in our lives. It makes us do things we hate and holds us back from doing what we love. Have you ever thought that it’s not the money that holds the power? It’s what you allow your mind to believe about money.

Ask yourself…which of the following do you believe is the truth about money:

  1. Your ability to generate money is tied to your job. Lose your job, lose your ability.
  2. Opportunities to generate money are everywhere. You just need to open your mind to the possibilities.

Stay tuned for more.

http://www.innerarchitect.com

Change Your Life: Change Your View of Money

“The only lack is the fear of lack in the mind of man.”
—Charles Fillmore, Co-Founder of Unity

I am grateful for having been introduced to the spiritual laws of prosperity for they have shown me a very different way to view money. These views helped me to release my fears that kept me clinging to a job that no longer fit.

It is possible to let go of the security of a paycheck and not live in a constant state of fear. Stay tuned to my continuing video series, Becoming an Inner Architect, and you’ll be shown how.

View Part 1 of the video series

View Part 2 of the video series

http://www.innerarchitect.com

Considering a Life Change?

 

 

I’m happy to announce my new weekly video series. It’s the product of what happened just shy of three years ago. I set off for work that Monday not expecting the day would lead me to something I didn’t think I had the guts to do. That day brought me to become crystal clear that it was time to make a change in what I was doing with the precious hours of my life. That was the day that I said goodbye to a successful career of 20 years.

My life since then has been about helping others to cross that bridge that was so difficult for me.

  • How do you let go of the means to pay your bills?
  • How do you leave a successful career in the hopes of starting another?
  • How do you get beyond the worry of what others will think about your leaving a good job to follow your heart?
  • How do you build the courage to leap into the unknown?

My upcoming book, Inner Architect: How to Build the Life You Were Designed to Live provides guidance for these issues and so much more. I’d like to offer you the first chapter of my book free. Just email me at susan@innerarchitect.com and I’ll send it to you.

http://www.innerarchitect.com

Money: How to Stop Letting it Get in Your Way of Creating Change

Many of us choke at the idea of making change because we worry about how we’re going to pay the bills. Here’s how you can let go of those fears and move forward on your dream:

1. Look at the first year of your transition as one in which you are making an investment in yourself. Depending on the extent of change you are making, it will be starting something new to some degree. Most new ventures take time to become profitable. Whether you will be taking a new job in a different industry, or starting something of your own, it is unrealistic to think that you will be making as much money as where you left off. It will be a period of learning and growing. You will be temporarily reducing your current financial wealth to increase the joy and satisfaction you experience in life moving forward. You will be turning your life in a vibrant new direction. You will be doing what you have always wanted. Doesn’t the investment seem worth it?

2. See this investment in yourself the same way you look at other financial investments, an intention to earn back what you’ve invested and more. We invest because we think we are going to be better off as a result. In this case, your investment can produce a higher quality of life, and perhaps even more money. As you create your new life, you are in control of your destiny. Who says that you won’t make twice or more your current income when you are established in your new work?

3. Allow yourself to use savings or some other chunk of money to finance your new life. If you have had a “do not touch” belief about savings or loans, can you try reframing this? Can you give yourself permission to use a specified amount to make this transition?

4. Trust your ability to manage your finances. Keep remembering that you are the one in control. You will know how much money you have to work with. You will know what decisions you must make around it. If down the road your money begins to run low before your new life is prospering, you can always take a detour. You can always get another job, or find some income opportunity.

5. Recognize the value of how fulfilling doing what you want can be, and not as difficult as most people think.

6. Understand that you just need to do something well, and soon you’ll have more work than you need. See the value in working your own hours. You may make more money working less time than you do now.

7. Remember that you have successfully managed yourself in the past. Your ability to do this will not disappear just because you are taking on a new adventure. You can learn to live a little differently.

 

How to Conquer the Fear of Not Being Good Enough

Don’t be afraid to let yourself be guided by the dreams and visions you have in your heart. These dreams represent your potential, who you truly are at your core. The fact that you have these dreams is evidence that they are attainable, even if they seem too good to be true.

What if something really does feel too good to be true?

Ask yourself one question. Is it too good to be true for anybody, or just too good to be true for you? This is an interesting question, isn’t it? Why should any idea be too good to be true? There is something about being human that leaves us wide open to questioning whether we are good enough. Why is it that we can muster up so much more worthiness for our family, friends, and neighbors than we can for ourselves? Just like we need to believe that we can reach something before we stretch our arms for it, we need to believe that we are entitled to something before we dare to begin to take the steps toward it.

Steps to conquer the fear of not being good enough:

  1. Look at yourself with compassion from the inside out and ask, what is really not good enough?”
  2. Look at your intention. Is it to do something that is good for you and your fellow man? Is so, ask what’s not to be good enough?
  3. Don’t compare yourself to others. Allow yourself to see that you bring your own unique gifts and experiences that make you different.
  4. Remind yourself that when you are being who you truly are, you are way more than good enough. You are in your right place. The process of getting from Point A to Point B may feel like it pushes your buttons of competency, yet that’s very different from your being good enough.
  5. Remember than absolutely nobody is perfect. Life itself is meant to be an experience that we learn and grow from.