wrestling with a fear of success


As humans most of us experience our bouts with fear.  It’s pretty easy to recognize when we’re dealing with a fear of what we think we won’t have enough of.  You know that feeling of not having enough money, enough love, enough friends and maybe even not having enough cool shoes to wear.  Yet have you ever had a wonderful opportunity show up in your life that has the potential to take you to a level you’ve not yet experienced?  Have you ever wrestled with a fear of success?

A year ago I published my first book, Unleashing Your Soul: Finding the Courage to Follow Your Heart.  I had wild dreams of it becoming a best-seller, yet the challenges of being a first-time self-published author came to the surface of reality and I allowed my dream bubble to burst.  I quickly made a shift to find satisfaction in hearing how the book was helping those who did read it.

Last week I received an email which told me that a woman named Maggie Mistal from Martha Stewart Living Radio had discovered my book on Amazon and wanted to interview me for an upcoming program on following your heart in your career.  Imagine my exhilaration as I grabbed the phone to call Maggie.  Within minutes she and I entered into a game of phone tag, leaving me as “it” at the end of her New York City work day.

I got together with a friend that night and was surprised that I could not match her level of excitement about this opportunity.  Normally a red-hot optimist, my mind had grabbed on to the fear that I would not be able to connect with Maggie in time to secure a spot on her schedule.  I couldn’t believe I was telling my friend that I didn’t want to count my chickens before they hatched.  That just wasn’t me.

Maggie and I were able to connect in the middle of the next morning.  I am now scheduled as a guest on “Career Talk” on Martha Stewart Living Radio on February 15th.  As I write this I know that I have not yet allowed the idea to fully hit me.  Slowly I am letting it flow into my mind.  I recognize I have some fear around it.  This is the kind of opportunity that has the potential to influence my career to a level I’ve dreamed about.  Yet what if that happens?  I like my little life.  I know what it feels like.  I don’t know what it feels like to live bigger.  And the unknown of that scares me a little.

I keep reminding myself that this opportunity came out of the blue at me for a reason.  I suppose it’s the divine’s way of saying it is time now to put myself out there in a bigger way.  And I know I need to follow that.  It’s not too different from when I felt called to quit my corporate career nearly two years ago.  Jumping into unknown territory is easier when I recognize that I am being guided by divine energy.  I know that I just need to get out of my own way and become excited about the opportunity in front of me.  I’ve got about a week left.  I think I can pull it together.

2 thoughts on “wrestling with a fear of success

  1. Congratulations on your interview with Martha Stewart Living Radio! You really are shifting into a “bigger” life! Embrace it and enjoy the ride! Just breathe through this next phase… it’ll feel natural in no time.

    I love the blog as well – your newsletters always seem right on track with what I’m going through, so it’ll be great to have “daily inspiration”. (*smile*)

    Best regards,

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