2008: The Year for Change

“You must be the change you wish to see in the world”
—Gandhi

“If anybody wants to keep creating they have to be about change.”
—Miles Davis

“Things do not change; we change.”
—Henry David Thoreau

It’s all about change this presidential year. Things aren’t working for us, so we’re embracing the choice to bring in a new leader. Here’s an invitation to take this scenario and apply it to your personal life.

What’s not working for you? And what are your options for change?

Change is all about doing something differently. It’s about making a different choice in what you’d like to change.

What would you like to change?

What different choice can you make today?

Make that choice and take a step towards change.

Considering a Life Change?

 

 

I’m happy to announce my new weekly video series. It’s the product of what happened just shy of three years ago. I set off for work that Monday not expecting the day would lead me to something I didn’t think I had the guts to do. That day brought me to become crystal clear that it was time to make a change in what I was doing with the precious hours of my life. That was the day that I said goodbye to a successful career of 20 years.

My life since then has been about helping others to cross that bridge that was so difficult for me.

  • How do you let go of the means to pay your bills?
  • How do you leave a successful career in the hopes of starting another?
  • How do you get beyond the worry of what others will think about your leaving a good job to follow your heart?
  • How do you build the courage to leap into the unknown?

My upcoming book, Inner Architect: How to Build the Life You Were Designed to Live provides guidance for these issues and so much more. I’d like to offer you the first chapter of my book free. Just email me at susan@innerarchitect.com and I’ll send it to you.

http://www.innerarchitect.com

Money: How to Stop Letting it Get in Your Way of Creating Change

Many of us choke at the idea of making change because we worry about how we’re going to pay the bills. Here’s how you can let go of those fears and move forward on your dream:

1. Look at the first year of your transition as one in which you are making an investment in yourself. Depending on the extent of change you are making, it will be starting something new to some degree. Most new ventures take time to become profitable. Whether you will be taking a new job in a different industry, or starting something of your own, it is unrealistic to think that you will be making as much money as where you left off. It will be a period of learning and growing. You will be temporarily reducing your current financial wealth to increase the joy and satisfaction you experience in life moving forward. You will be turning your life in a vibrant new direction. You will be doing what you have always wanted. Doesn’t the investment seem worth it?

2. See this investment in yourself the same way you look at other financial investments, an intention to earn back what you’ve invested and more. We invest because we think we are going to be better off as a result. In this case, your investment can produce a higher quality of life, and perhaps even more money. As you create your new life, you are in control of your destiny. Who says that you won’t make twice or more your current income when you are established in your new work?

3. Allow yourself to use savings or some other chunk of money to finance your new life. If you have had a “do not touch” belief about savings or loans, can you try reframing this? Can you give yourself permission to use a specified amount to make this transition?

4. Trust your ability to manage your finances. Keep remembering that you are the one in control. You will know how much money you have to work with. You will know what decisions you must make around it. If down the road your money begins to run low before your new life is prospering, you can always take a detour. You can always get another job, or find some income opportunity.

5. Recognize the value of how fulfilling doing what you want can be, and not as difficult as most people think.

6. Understand that you just need to do something well, and soon you’ll have more work than you need. See the value in working your own hours. You may make more money working less time than you do now.

7. Remember that you have successfully managed yourself in the past. Your ability to do this will not disappear just because you are taking on a new adventure. You can learn to live a little differently.

 

How to Conquer the Fear of Not Being Good Enough

Don’t be afraid to let yourself be guided by the dreams and visions you have in your heart. These dreams represent your potential, who you truly are at your core. The fact that you have these dreams is evidence that they are attainable, even if they seem too good to be true.

What if something really does feel too good to be true?

Ask yourself one question. Is it too good to be true for anybody, or just too good to be true for you? This is an interesting question, isn’t it? Why should any idea be too good to be true? There is something about being human that leaves us wide open to questioning whether we are good enough. Why is it that we can muster up so much more worthiness for our family, friends, and neighbors than we can for ourselves? Just like we need to believe that we can reach something before we stretch our arms for it, we need to believe that we are entitled to something before we dare to begin to take the steps toward it.

Steps to conquer the fear of not being good enough:

  1. Look at yourself with compassion from the inside out and ask, what is really not good enough?”
  2. Look at your intention. Is it to do something that is good for you and your fellow man? Is so, ask what’s not to be good enough?
  3. Don’t compare yourself to others. Allow yourself to see that you bring your own unique gifts and experiences that make you different.
  4. Remind yourself that when you are being who you truly are, you are way more than good enough. You are in your right place. The process of getting from Point A to Point B may feel like it pushes your buttons of competency, yet that’s very different from your being good enough.
  5. Remember than absolutely nobody is perfect. Life itself is meant to be an experience that we learn and grow from.

Is This All There Is?

When you are feeling that there must be something more,
it means there is.

How do you go about finding it?

Step 1: Ask yourself if you believe you have a purposeful contribution to make to this world.

You cannot discover your purpose unless you are clear that you have one. You don’t need to know what that specific role is right now, but you do need to believe there is something you are here to do, to be, or to accomplish. Your purpose does not necessarily have to be something that will go down in the world’s history records.

No one calling is better than another. The universe needs us all.

Your Life: It’s Your Choice, Remember?

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One day just shy of twelve and a half years ago, I discovered that the man I was married to was involved with another woman. That evening, after I told him what I’d learned, he replied by telling me that he wanted out of the marriage. He left me that night, only to return several weeks later to pick up his things. I don’t know which was harder to deal with, suddenly feeling alone in the world, or the pain of the betrayal. The days that followed were the darkest that I’ve yet to endure, yet despite how badly I was hurting, I just knew that there was a reason for what I was experiencing. It was to bring me here, where I am today.

I’ve learned a lot from that experience. And as strange as this may sound, I am grateful for it. I’ve learned about forgiveness, and the depths of my strength. But the most valuable gift that has come with it is my faith in life. I’ve come to believe that nothing is a random event. I look at every moment as an opportunity of destiny, to which I’ve been given a choice in how I will respond. That’s how we create our lives, moment by moment.

Stop for a minute and think about what it is that you want from your life. Then make the choice that you will experience that. Remember that you are free in every single moment to believe whatever you want to believe about anything. The only thing stopping you from seeing the beauty is your choice to see it that way. The only thing standing in the way of you and your dreams is you making the choice to believe that they have a chance in coming true. So why not choose to believe magnificent things about your life, and just do it?

www.sanctuaryforchange.com

Do You Tolerate Fraud in Your Outer Persona?

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In yesterday’s article, Are You Doing What You Came Here to Do?, I shared the benefits of living in alignment with your true self. Today I want to follow that up with some tips on how you can begin to get in deeper touch with who you really are and what you are here to do. Today’s focus is on discerning the difference between the self that you share with the outer world and the voice that flows inside of you.

The key to knowing your true self is first in believing that there is a divine life that is you. It’s recognizing that who you really are is more than the role you play in your family or community, your job, your interests and the thoughts that run through your mind. Those things are all a part of the tapestry that makes up your physical self, yet they are really only the human legs for your divine self. Think of them like the machine and environment for your divine self to thrive and grow. With that idea as your framework, here are some practical tips for getting in touch and living in greater alignment with the soul of who you really are.

Many of us begin this journey with an outer persona that we show the world and an inner self that we keep hidden. Sometimes we put so much focus on our outer persona that we are totally detached from the essence of who we are and what is calling our heart. You can begin to get in touch with who you really are by paying attention to where you feel out of alignment in your outer world. For example:

  • Does your work feed your soul or are you just in it for the paycheck? If your work doesn’t feed you, what would you love to do if money was not part of the equation? Don’t edit or judge the dreams that you have. Consider them as significant and credible clues to who you are and what you are here to do.
  • Give yourself quiet time to listen to your inner voice. Whenever you find yourself alone, reject the tendency to busy yourself. When you’re driving alone in your car, turn off the music and pay attention to what is going on inside of you. When you’re in a waiting room, don’t distract yourself with a magazine or newspaper. Just close your eyes and turn within. Don’t get hung up worrying about what other people are going to think. Get to know your inner voice. What does it dream about? What ideas might it have about you that you may be too afraid to share with anyone else? Give this voice and its instincts credibility and strive to follow it.
  • Consider your life experiences and ask yourself during what events did you feel most alive. Do you have a nagging desire that raises its head every once in awhile that you just keep pushing down because you tell yourself that you’ll never have the guts to go for it? Is there a common theme in what makes you feel alive and those desires that just don’t go away? If so, this is a major clue calling your attention to what you are here to do.
  • Surround yourself with people with whom you can show up authentically. Sometimes we hold on to relationships simply for the sake of history. The relationship may feel like a drain or no longer a fit, yet we don’t want to hurt that person so we continue on even when it doesn’t feel good. Yet any relationship that doesn’t give you the freedom or support to express what is in your heart limits your ability to live in fuller alignment with who you really are.
  • Begin to identify with yourself as your divine self and not your bodily self. Even if you are still fuzzy about who you really are, think about that concept throughout the day. Seek to start each day off with this thought. Don’t take your divine self too seriously, though. Have fun with the idea.

Thanks for visiting. Stay tuned for more of this theme as it unfolds this week. Please feel free to email me if I can answer any questions.

My best to you,

Susan Hanshaw
susan@sanctuaryforchange.com

getting comfortable with being real

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Expressing your authentic self is a topic I write much about in my space here. And while I’ve done quite a lot of work in this department on my own the last couple of years, I sometimes see examples of how I need to feel more comfortable about shining my true light. What is that statement…we teach what we need to learn?

My journey has shown me that it sometimes takes time to find the courage to show up and speak from your heart. By this I don’t mean just being honest with the words that fly out of your mouth. I’m talking about forging an alignment with your inner and outer expressions. It’s when who you are on the inside is what you represent on the outside; when there are no masks to remove or costumes to put on. You’re one hundred percent bona fide real.

Perhaps like me you’ve had the experience of playing a role that doesn’t really fit you. Maybe it did once, yet you’ve grown out of it over the years. Or maybe it never really fit you, but you played it anyway just because it seemed like the proper thing to do. And now as uncomfortable as it may feel, at least it is familiar. You’re confident that you will continue to be accepted so you don’t worry about what others are going to think. You’re experienced so you don’t have to push yourself out of your comfort zone too often. So you grab that worn coat and walk out the door, all the while thinking how you can’t wait to return so that you can hang it back up in the anticipation of just being yourself in the privacy of your own castle.

I spent 20 years building a reputation of being a skilled direct mail marketer. Then as I got into my forties I got uncomfortable with the realization that I was spending my days filling people’s mailboxes with offers to buy stuff. After all, I’m not exactly the material girl. And I finally got uncomfortable enough to quit. What I didn’t realize until afterwards was just how much I had hidden who I really was from the outside world. I was so inexperienced with showing up authentically that it took me well over a year to start speaking at depth publicly about my spiritual beliefs. I feel like I now have some sense of what it must be like to come out of the proverbial closet.

I got another taste of this as I just launched my work into the video arena. I couldn’t figure out why I was so darned uncomfortable watching myself on screen when it hit me. I was feeling vulnerable. There I was exposing myself in a new way for anyone to see. I found a lot of comfort in discovering what was up with me. I recognized that I was merely dealing with a learning curve. I needed to give myself time to adjust to showing up this way. It was just another new role. Just like getting over the stage fright I felt when I first officiated ceremonies or teaching my first few classes.

The key to feeling comfortable with being real is accepting first that what you want to show on the outside is the authentic expression of who you really are. It’s your soul wanting to sneak out of hiding. And just like everything else that you do for the first few times, it may seem uncomfortable and maybe even a bit challenging. Yet when you break through your learning curve you will experience the bliss that cannot be achieved anywhere else than through feeding your heart’s expression. That’s passion at its finest hour.

Is there something that you’ve been holding back in your heart? Is there something that you long to be or an understanding that you desire to share? Is there a habit that you wish to leave behind so that you can express a new way of being? If you’re holding back because showing up in a new way feels so uncomfortable, tell yourself that it won’t always feel that way. Love yourself like the baby who learned to crawl before you took your first upright steps. Where would you be now if you hadn’t tried?

Thanks for visiting. I’m wishing you an amazing life.

In peace and light,
Susan Hanshaw