You Always Have Choices

You always have choices

Have you ever felt like you were stuck in a situation that you didn’t really like, but you couldn’t see that you had any options except to remain on that path?

I have.

And I learned that feeling stuck was a message to me that my life was begging for change.

One thing I’ve learned recently is that all of my habits that formed my day-to-day life pre-COVID-19 were not iron-clad. I was forced to make a different choice…because the choice I was used to was no longer available.

And you know what? I’m happier for it.

I learned that I didn’t have to feel like I was a slave to the gym.

I learned that I could shop for groceries once a week instead of stopping several times a week just for a few choice items.

I learned that I could be more productive setting distinct goals for my work day at home than clocking in 8 hours in at the office without.

I learned that I am actually capable of coloring my own hair.

I learned that I don’t need to travel and have days and nights out on the town to feel gratitude for my husband and life in general.

I learned that phone calls with my family and friends could be far richer when I rely on non-physical means for our main connection.

I would have never considered I had these opportunities because my blinders were so fully set on the picture I’d created of my life.

As we all maneuver through the various challenges of the time, let’s consider these days as an opportunity to rebuild our lives in ways we never seriously pursued.

It’s a time ripe for reinvention. Let’s cherish the opportunity.

Take care.

An Exercise for Breaking through Obstacles

I had one of my most fulfilling experiences on Friday when I was invited to speak at a nonprofit organization whose mission is to help those who are most in need to succeed. Sixty women who are enrolled in various vocational job training programs attended my workshop, “The Secret to Success”. Why was it so fulfilling? Because for at least our 90 minutes together, my ideas made a difference.

The breakthrough lesson was how our beliefs are all that holds us back from taking the steps to succeed. We did an exercise that first asked them to write answers to the following:

  • What fears do you have about your job future?
  • What ideas are limiting what you think you can achieve or become in your life?
  • What is holding you back from believing you can stay dedicated to doing the necessary work?

In the second part of the exercise, I asked them to go back and write down what new ideas they could replace the ones above with that would support them in taking action. After a few minutes, several shared how writing their thoughts down enabled them to get clarity they’d never had before.

We can help ourselves break through all our obstacles if only we look closely enough to see what they are.

Try the exercise yourself and see what you might learn.

www.innerarchitect.com

12 Steps to Make Your Dream Your Life

I delivered the pdf file for my upcoming book, Inner Architect: How to Build the Life You Were Designed to Live, to the printer this past Thursday. On Friday afternoon something incredible hit me. I am in the process of bringing life to my dream! Holy cow. Why did it take me so long to see clearly what is right in front of me? What was I thinking to expect that one single event would bring my dream to life? It really is all about baby steps.

Three years ago this month, I walked away from a successful 20-year career in the corporate world to follow a dream. It hasn’t been an easy journey, that’s for sure, and I’ve got a ways to go. But I can see now that I am on my way.

Your way to your dream can be found in these steps:

  1. Recognize that you have the choice to create a different life.
  2. Believe that it is possible to successfully build your dream.
  3. Define the obstacles that are holding you back.
  4. Replace your obstacles with ideas that support you.
  5. Give credibility to the desires of your heart and learn to trust it.
  6. Outline your training and development needs.
  7. Crystallize your vision.
  8. Identify your major goals.
  9. Define the steps necessary to achieve your goals.
  10. Stay committed to doing the necessary work.
  11. Support your external work with thoughts that help to build it.
  12. See yourself now in the beginning stages of your new life.

Your Heart: Your Wisest Compass

Giving credibility to messages from your heart is a key step to happiness in all areas of your life. Yet most of us have not been taught to lead our lives this way. We may recognize that a fulfilled heart is the key to a happy life, yet we don’t often trust our hearts to lead us there. It is as if we expect that our heart is going to lead us down an irresponsible path of whim and wild.

 

How to trust your heart more than your analytical mind:

  1. Allow your heart to play a role in all matters of your life, just as you allow it a significant role in your personal relationships.
  2. Acknowledge that your heart is the center of your spiritual essence. As such, it is the most knowledgeable entity about who you really are at the core and what is right for you.
  3. Believe that your heart always has your best interest in mind.
  4. Practice following your heart for simple decisions so that you can build the experience to trust it in larger issues.

Money: Are Your Erroneous Views Getting in Your Way?

Money is such a driving force in our lives. It makes us do things we hate and holds us back from doing what we love. Have you ever thought that it’s not the money that holds the power? It’s what you allow your mind to believe about money.

This one-minute video is the first of a three-part series which showcases common erroneous views about money, and how you can change those views to free your mind.

Ask yourself…which of the following do you believe is the truth about money:

  1. Your ability to generate money is tied to your job. Lose your job, lose your ability.
  2. Opportunities to generate money are everywhere. You just need to open your mind to the possibilities.

Stay tuned for more.

http://www.innerarchitect.com

Considering a Life Change?

 

 

I’m happy to announce my new weekly video series. It’s the product of what happened just shy of three years ago. I set off for work that Monday not expecting the day would lead me to something I didn’t think I had the guts to do. That day brought me to become crystal clear that it was time to make a change in what I was doing with the precious hours of my life. That was the day that I said goodbye to a successful career of 20 years.

My life since then has been about helping others to cross that bridge that was so difficult for me.

  • How do you let go of the means to pay your bills?
  • How do you leave a successful career in the hopes of starting another?
  • How do you get beyond the worry of what others will think about your leaving a good job to follow your heart?
  • How do you build the courage to leap into the unknown?

My upcoming book, Inner Architect: How to Build the Life You Were Designed to Live provides guidance for these issues and so much more. I’d like to offer you the first chapter of my book free. Just email me at susan@innerarchitect.com and I’ll send it to you.

http://www.innerarchitect.com

Money: How to Stop Letting it Get in Your Way of Creating Change

Many of us choke at the idea of making change because we worry about how we’re going to pay the bills. Here’s how you can let go of those fears and move forward on your dream:

1. Look at the first year of your transition as one in which you are making an investment in yourself. Depending on the extent of change you are making, it will be starting something new to some degree. Most new ventures take time to become profitable. Whether you will be taking a new job in a different industry, or starting something of your own, it is unrealistic to think that you will be making as much money as where you left off. It will be a period of learning and growing. You will be temporarily reducing your current financial wealth to increase the joy and satisfaction you experience in life moving forward. You will be turning your life in a vibrant new direction. You will be doing what you have always wanted. Doesn’t the investment seem worth it?

2. See this investment in yourself the same way you look at other financial investments, an intention to earn back what you’ve invested and more. We invest because we think we are going to be better off as a result. In this case, your investment can produce a higher quality of life, and perhaps even more money. As you create your new life, you are in control of your destiny. Who says that you won’t make twice or more your current income when you are established in your new work?

3. Allow yourself to use savings or some other chunk of money to finance your new life. If you have had a “do not touch” belief about savings or loans, can you try reframing this? Can you give yourself permission to use a specified amount to make this transition?

4. Trust your ability to manage your finances. Keep remembering that you are the one in control. You will know how much money you have to work with. You will know what decisions you must make around it. If down the road your money begins to run low before your new life is prospering, you can always take a detour. You can always get another job, or find some income opportunity.

5. Recognize the value of how fulfilling doing what you want can be, and not as difficult as most people think.

6. Understand that you just need to do something well, and soon you’ll have more work than you need. See the value in working your own hours. You may make more money working less time than you do now.

7. Remember that you have successfully managed yourself in the past. Your ability to do this will not disappear just because you are taking on a new adventure. You can learn to live a little differently.

 

How to Conquer the Fear of Not Being Good Enough

Don’t be afraid to let yourself be guided by the dreams and visions you have in your heart. These dreams represent your potential, who you truly are at your core. The fact that you have these dreams is evidence that they are attainable, even if they seem too good to be true.

What if something really does feel too good to be true?

Ask yourself one question. Is it too good to be true for anybody, or just too good to be true for you? This is an interesting question, isn’t it? Why should any idea be too good to be true? There is something about being human that leaves us wide open to questioning whether we are good enough. Why is it that we can muster up so much more worthiness for our family, friends, and neighbors than we can for ourselves? Just like we need to believe that we can reach something before we stretch our arms for it, we need to believe that we are entitled to something before we dare to begin to take the steps toward it.

Steps to conquer the fear of not being good enough:

  1. Look at yourself with compassion from the inside out and ask, what is really not good enough?”
  2. Look at your intention. Is it to do something that is good for you and your fellow man? Is so, ask what’s not to be good enough?
  3. Don’t compare yourself to others. Allow yourself to see that you bring your own unique gifts and experiences that make you different.
  4. Remind yourself that when you are being who you truly are, you are way more than good enough. You are in your right place. The process of getting from Point A to Point B may feel like it pushes your buttons of competency, yet that’s very different from your being good enough.
  5. Remember than absolutely nobody is perfect. Life itself is meant to be an experience that we learn and grow from.

How to Find Your Purpose

You cannot discover your purpose unless you think you can.

Try to let go of the idea that discovering your purpose has to be hard. Replace it with the idea that discovering your purpose is simply a matter of tuning in and paying attention to who you are, what you love and what is important to you.

Tip: Pay attention to activities that give you tremendous joy.

Have you ever noticed how happy you are when you are doing what you really enjoy? Take a minute to think about what it is that really makes you feel alive.

Is there something that, when you’ve just finished spending some time doing it, you get so conscious of the joy it’s brought you that you tell yourself that you’ve just got to find more time to do it?

Is there something that you lose yourself in, that there never seems to be enough time to get your fill?

Is there some wild hair idea that floats in your mind that just won’t go away?

People have shared this thought with me about teaching children to play tennis, providing foster care for abandoned dogs, making furniture for the home, and providing deep sea fishing excursions for stressed executives. The list goes on and on.

Tip: Don’t judge or try to measure the value of what your heart wants to do. Just listen.