Accepting the Flow without the Hissie Fit


I had an experience yesterday that left me shaking my head in awe at the wonder of the universe. I recently started working on a proposal for my second book, a project that I find rather daunting. I had spent much of the day before toiling over how to best present the overview for the book. I knew at the time that it felt like I was forcing ideas, yet I was more focused on making progress than I was paying attention to what was not flowing naturally. So by the end of the day I had pushed three pages to the surface. I wasn’t thrilled about my work, yet I figured I could clean it up with some good word-smithing when I was more in the mood. It had been a hard day of work and I was thrilled to have that portion of the proposal pretty much behind me.

The next morning I turned my computer on and opened the file to continue on with the proposal. “Oh my God!” I screamed from my home office. My partner, Dean, thought I was responding to a piece of horrific world news, but instead I was shouting my disbelief that all my hard work was gone. The file on my computer contained only the first couple of paragraphs I had started the week before. So for the next hour, in between hissie fits about my bad luck, I searched feverishly to uncover a file that held my work. When I exhausted all the ways I knew to look for files, I told Dean that I was giving up. When he suggested that I make a call to my computer consultant, I got in touch with what I knew was really going on. I had been led to ditch my first effort because it wasn’t good enough. It hadn’t come from my heart.

I know that there are skeptics out there who believe that sometimes, maybe even most of the time, that things happen by chance. My inner being knows that losing this file was not an event of chance. You see, I very rarely lose files. And when I do, I know my way around a computer well enough to be able to recover them. This time the file was nowhere to be found. I searched the hard drive, the hidden files and the temporary files. The manner in which it had completely vanished still has me shaking my head.

My conclusion? I believe the universe was telling me that the way I had presented my book in the first effort was not representative of what I am proposing to bring to the world. So I started all over again, this time speaking from my heart. And this time, my proposal is in total alignment with my book. This experience has served as yet another example of how the universe is always supporting me for my higher good. I just wish I could have embraced this idea without the hissie fits. Maybe next time…

How about you?  What ugly thing have you encountered that just might ring with purpose?

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